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To charge a laptop in the car (or us it "plugged in"), you'd probably need an inverter (basically a box that converts your 12 volt DC into 110 AC). You'd plug the inverter into the "cigarette lighter" port at the bottom of the dash, and plug your laptop's power brick into one of the AC outlets on the inverter. This might only work when the key's in the "On" position.
The USB port in the glove box, as FexMonkey mentioned, is to plug in an iPod or thumb drive to play through the stereo.
The S on the gear shift is for "Sport" mode, where you can shift manually using the paddles, if you desire. Shifting with the paddles merely overrides the shift points on the automatic transmission, at least up to the point where the transmission shifts itself to avoid overrevving the engine. It's fun to play with, but probably won't do much for the fuel economy, which is why most people buy the Fit anyway. Shifting with the paddles WILL NOT ruin your car. Sounds to me like your car salesman, like altogether too many others, knows very little about what he's selling....
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